Hello once more and apologies once more. Again I have been rather lackadaisical in my approach to this issue and can only apologise whilst insisting that I had a good reason. Anyway, that good reason has returned to Scotland now so I have no more excuses and really should focus all of my efforts into creating an intelligent, witty, informative, and most importantly, fun, weekly round-up of all things digitally nomadic. A few things to mention here before I start. I foolishly dropped my phone the other day and cracked the screen, it turns out that by owning an (incredibly great) Doogee phone you run the risk of not being able to get it repaired anywhere within 50 km of your current location. Any ideas anyone? Secondly, 3 Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri. Pretty great yeah, not sure I’m buying into it being the ‘bestest’ film ever but it was enjoyable, well worth a watch. Finally, as it’s ‘tom feeling sorry for himself’ Wednesday I may have a look at some of the things not to read in today’s issue, I can feel the bitterness rising…
Where to get a job?
What, really? Still. You still don’t know where to look for work even though we’ve been over it at least 22 times before? Cripes. OK, last time now.
Once you’ve exhausted that pretty great piece of work you might want to have a gander at the work at home wife who I assume is a wife that works at home, she might have some good ideas for you. I can only guess that you don’t have to work from home and/or be someone’s wife to use the website.
I’m replacing this section from the next issue onwards. Feel free to give me some ideas so that you might get something relevant and that I don’t have to think for myself! I would consider something along the line of ‘guest contributor of the issue’ where I will post links to you, some of your articles, a mini-bio etc. It will be free of course but some mutual promotion would be a bonus and muchly appreciated! If you like the idea feel free to get in touch at email@example.com
This baffles me. A cryptocurrency digital nomad debit card. It might be great, it might be not great, I’m oblivious to cryptocurrency I’m afraid. Minds far keener on the subject than my own may get something out of it. I’ve never seen it before so I figured some people might get a kick out of it.
You know, it’s getting incredibly difficult filling this section up with things I think are:
3. Well written
4. Not awful
Now that’s not a pop at anyone, I’m just politely requesting that you up your game a little otherwise I am going to have to create some of my own original content!
I mean I don’t mind doing it really if I’m in the mood, and at least that way we would all get something unique for our click. Have you seen how generic everything is now? It’s so boring and samey, I mean, I accept that you have to keep things vaguely relevant to the digital nomad lifestyle but talk about a saturated market. How many ‘top 5 things to do in Thailand’ lists do you need, get on TripAdvisor. Jeez. If you’re going to write a review of somewhere* at least do it for somewhere new.
*Yeah, I know, I have in the past written these travel guides but that was years ago, I am much older, balder and wiser these days…
Cripes, if I wrote things in an engaging style and knew 4 years ago (when this website started) what I know now I could’ve made a fortune churning out the tripe that people get away with. Still, I won’t compromise my (vague) principles for an easy euro (just yet). I will endeavour to do the digital nomad community a great service and create original, engaging and clever(?) content that’s actually useful to people and isn’t hidden behind a poxy paywall or wrapped up in empty promises of ‘immense wealth and a glorious lifestyle for only $10’ or ‘book a phone call with me, only $50 an hour and you can ask me all the questions you want and it will be great and you will earn $84,000 by Tuesday!’ I’ve got a question or two for you chief:
‘Do you wear a mask when you’re robbing the poor buggers on the phone?’ and ‘How do you sleep at night?’
What to read in the Guardian?
Find something adventurous to do here. Be a daredevil!
U2 sang about a place where the streets have no name, I am singing about a place where each day lasts 100 hours. 1 of us has sold millions of records. 1 of us has sold no records. 1 of us wears sunglasses indoors like a div. 1 of us does not.
This is weird. How to get the natural ‘no makeup makeup’ look. I have got a pretty good idea how to do it but I doubt it will fill your word count quota.
Where to go?
Las Palmas looks nice
All three bottom options are perfect for a night or two if you are in the Algarve. I would go again.
What to eat?
It’s time for some blatant self-promotion, sound the klaxon. If you like the idea of being a vegetarian or even just eating vegetables sometimes head to twig boy cooks. My new vegetarian venture helping you to create delicious vegetarian meals easily and cheaply. All twig boy cooks recipes are suitable for all levels of cooking ability and whilst still a fledgeling operation, new recipes are added daily. Many of the recipes are vegan-friendly and all are made in-house by our team of (un)trained cooks (me, sometimes Mowgli). Recent updates include tofish and chips, an all-day veggie breakfast bake and crispy lemon tofu.
What to drink?
Well, this is just getting embarrassing now. Also found on twig boy cooks is a drinks section! We currently only have one drink on offer which is our unique ‘less risk of diabetes than your average internet recipe lemon and lime squash concoction’ a guaranteed thirst quencher on a hot day. Twig boy cooks will be adding more drinks as soon as we’ve thought of some more and yes, they will be alcoholic.
Just the usual really. This issue of nomad news from nowhere is a precursor to the aforementioned ‘original, creative and useful content that will soon be coming your way. Feel free to get in touch about almost anything you like. I’m usually quite good at replying. Have a cosmic week, take it easy. Remember to cook with twig boy.